Friday, December 6, 2013
Don't sweat the small stuff....but to me nothing is small
I am sitting here watching my kids play and be loud and well.....just be kids and I am full of anxiety. I have always wanted a big family, lots of babies, but I feel like I am failing at this. I have such a hard time just sitting and enjoying my kids, it seems like they drive me crazy MOST of the time. I want so badly to be a good, fun mom that just lets everything roll off, but I cant and I find myself stressed, screaming, and having anxiety attacks. Parenting does not come easy for me and never has. I did not grow up with good parents that taught me so most of the "normal" parenting that I have seen has been in bits at friends houses and on TV. I know that sounds nuts but its kinda hard to learn to be a parent when you haven't really had any and watching a 30 minute episode of Roseanne just doesn't cut it.